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Old 07-04-2009, 07:30 PM   #21
Ted Apollo
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

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Originally Posted by Rene Forestier View Post
I don't want to sound all "alternative", but I think one has to look at everything else first (eg. diet and lifestyle) before jumping on the medication train.

i agree with the medication comment. i am not a big supporter of western medicine (quick fix in a pill), but either way he could discuss this with his psychiatrist. often times they are more then willing to experiment with diet, homeopathic, or what ever alternative you want to attempt. but i think its important to work with a professional on this.

although i have only dealt with social anxiety when i was younger. it was due to insecurity in my appearance after i gained 70lbs after high school. as i got older and over myself (plus everyone else got fat) then i was able to be more comfortable in my own skin. some of those social situations will make anyone unnerved (family, other parents, etc...)

what i see that you are experiencing seems to be something a little different. i have seen someone close to me go thru something similiar to you and over years it became worse and worse. there were a few clues when they were younger, but they seemed like normal phobias: fear of flying, etc... then he began to go into states of delusion for a few days. scary stuff. he was diagnosed as bipolar (i think stage 2) and do to his heavy marijuana smoking there was an element of paranoia. doc rx'd medicine, but alot of these patients will stop taking it because 1)they start to feel better and don't think they need it. 2) they are used to the ups and downs there whole life. so they miss the good times since the medicine kind of puts you in the middle. over time the doctor can monitor the medication levels and scale back until they find the right amount.

the danger is things can get worse when they are untreated. a few days in a manic state turns into a week in a manic state then eventually it can become permanent. so read up on everything because you do have the power to heal yourself, but do it under the supervision of a professional.

do you experience any insomnia?
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Old 07-05-2009, 02:22 AM   #22
Justin Shipley
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

Yes, Ted, when i don't smoke...
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Old 07-05-2009, 02:50 AM   #23
Justin Shipley
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

The bipolar symptoms definitely ring a bell, i'm prone to rapid -read instantaneous- mood shifts when i feel threatened, stressed, nervous, or revved up. just ask my wife and kids... to be honest, seeking help is as much for their benefit as my own, as my wife has to deal with enough already with four young children as well as me either climbing the walls and snapping at the slightest provocation, then withdrawing into my shell in shame and guilt for hours or days or weeks. And my poor little kids just don't understand why Dad swings from one extreme to another, with no 'good Dad' in between - just 'bad Dad' in varying degrees

Don't get me wrong, i am against medication on principle - i am not suffering a deficiency of Ritalin, or similar- but acceptance of my condition means accepting that all have my attempts so far have simply resulted in things getting worse, and that i have run out of ideas and energy, and this is affecting others, not just me. If i were single and childless, i would probably just soldier on, i'm big enough and tough enough to look after myself...just... but i can't spread it any thinner, and everyone is suffering

The cannabis, like other meds, evens out the highs and lows, and makes me sleep more than soundly.

Off it, i'm confronted by a different me, who is thinking and moving so fast that i can't stop my sharp tongue and over the top responses to any perceived slight, even as they happen before my eyes.

I guess this is how paranoia plays out for me... not the 'people are watching me' type, but the lightning quick, flinch-like out-of-order responses because on some level i feel threatened and out of control

My maternal grandfather and one uncle are the same, so i have had the double-dose of repeated exposure to this behaviour in strong male role models in my formative years, as well as possible hereditary links....great

And yes, the 'feeling better, go off the meds' rings a bell too...in the past when i have quit, for extended periods of weeks or a couple of months, i 'start feeling better' and think to myself 'i've got it under control now; a little puff might be just the thing...!', and away we go again

...whew... again, dunno where this is heading, but theres a bit more of the bigger picture...
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Old 07-05-2009, 08:38 AM   #24
Ted Apollo
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

people don't realize how taxing mental health can be on the family. in alot of ways it is much tougher then dealing with a terminal illness like cancer. remember that you can't really change the way you feel and your emotions, but you can control the way you behave. that takes alot of work to get to that level.

i was in a bad marriage for years and we did alot of therapy. here is a story that used to hang on the wall in the office: I was walking down a street and didn't see a hole in the ground so i fell in. the next time down the block i saw the hole but still fell in. the next attempt i saw the hole, tried to avoid it, but still fell in. the next time i went down the block i saw the hole and was barely able to get around it without falling in. the next time i just walked on the other side of the street.

i think that story is a great way to describe the process of recovery. first you have to become aware of your problem. then even when you are aware of your problem you still fall into old behaviors. eventually thru a conscious effort you can take control of your life and actions. so it will be a long process, but you have already began your road to recovery!
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Old 07-05-2009, 08:42 AM   #25
Ted Apollo
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

something else is that 'stress' can become a trigger for your condition. its hard to change your environment (wife, kids, job, etc...) but you can slightly change your perception of those 'stressful' situations. and i believe this is where the buddhist philosophies help release some of the steam of daily living in western society.
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Old 07-05-2009, 04:10 PM   #26
Justin Shipley
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

Thanks Ted.
I'm reading the Art of Happiness when i can find a minute here or there. The Buddhist way of looking at things definitely illustrates how our conventional Western viewpoint almost sets things in motion for major disappointment, frustration,and other issues at some point in our journey...
So now it's the simple task of reversing a lifetime of conditioning, ignoring societal and cultural influences, and adopting a completely new paradigm!

Didn't mean that to be sarcastic; my early morning sense of humour(?)!
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Old 07-05-2009, 06:52 PM   #27
Darrell E. White
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

Justin, with all due respect to the other posters, especially Ted, it's time for some serious primary therapy and probably some serious medication. Then, and only then, can you add in the other very good advice that you have received, perhaps even as a way to decrease whatever medicine is initially needed.

20 years of daily self-medication, and the symptoms and behavior you describe off your "medication" puts you well beyond the "let's take a look at what stresses you out" method until you've shaken out your foundational treatment. Anyone standing on "I'm against medicine on principle" now is being irresponsible IMO until you have been seen by a professional.

Find a therapist. Find a doc who can prescribe what is necessary to allow you to start to heal. Do the other stuff, sure, but don't wait. Wife and 4 kids? 20 years of smoking? Get on it, Brother.

--bingo
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Old 07-05-2009, 07:19 PM   #28
Ted Apollo
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

bingo, i agree with you 100%. i hope that my earlier posts stressed how important it is that you have to go to a professional. what ever decisions for treatment you chose has to be done under supervision from a doctor. you owe it to your family to get the proper care.
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Old 07-06-2009, 01:01 AM   #29
Justin Shipley
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

Darrell, Ted, many thanks again for your input.
I've just arrived back from the GP's office, where they are faxing a referral to a private psychiatrist in town, and i'm waiting on the phone call to confirm an appointment. Feeling lighter just having done that, setting the wheels in motion...

Again many thanks to all who have contributed; this was exactly what i wanted and needed from posting on this board- it truly is a remarkable and effective way of getting a lot of sometimes divergent and conflicting info on ANY subject, but the net result is always that i end up better informed and therefore better armed to move forward than if i had never asked, or simply continued stabbing in the dark.

Like i said before, I trust you guys- you're Crossfitters, after all- and my trust has been repaid. This is the only source i felt comfortable asking for assistance from, due to it's semi-anonymity (is that a word?), and the straight answers and good advice i wished for were forthcoming.

I'm a little teary with gratitude now...sniff... but happy to be moving finally in a positive direction. I'll keep y'all posted.

Again, muchas gracias
Justin
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Old 07-06-2009, 01:32 AM   #30
Ted Apollo
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Re: Anxiety - some help, please...

no problem bro! glad to hear that you are getting the help you need. i have always believed that the crossfit community embodies a fraternal spirit in all of its members. its not just about heavy back squats, pr's, and pukie.

keep us updated on how your doing. and if you need to just vent or whatever feel free to post or send me a private message. take care
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