Can't Lose Belly Fat

[Jason Halm]

Originally Posted by Chris Caruso

He specifically said he was also eating macadamia nuts and jerky. The 'or' referred to eating either raspberries or strawberries with those two previous foods. A pound of strawberries is only about 150 calories anyway, and provides a pretty huge hit of vitamins and fiber.

Oh, damn. That just seems like SO MUCH. I'm used to people eating a pound of meat, not a pound of fruit.

[Dan Schaal]

Originally Posted by Michael Dowling

dan if you're not abusing alcohol and you enjoy it with friends why bother cutting it out just to get to an arbitrary BF % number? (i could've sworn i wrote this already but i guess i didn't submit it) now if it's a crutch and being abused i could see completely cutting it out.

as for your wife problems, more reasons not to cut out beer and wine. a glass or two of wine or an ice cold beer at times can pick the spirits up. good luck brother that's brutal especially with little kids involved, you can't just walk away from her, you're tied to her financially for the better part of 20 years so you gotta make something work.

Thanks Michael and the rest of the responses. There is no alcohol abuse. Life is way too busy and important to drown the sorrows at the bottom of a bottle. I rather an intense workout at Crossfit Fairfax! I had a very difficult month of Nov/Dec 2010, but my mental outlook/focus has improved greatly since then. At the end of the day, I know I am a great father and husband.
You are 110% correct about not walking away and being tied to her financially for the better part of 20 years. The problem is, I don't think she is mature enough to fully recognize this.

We have been married for seven years and together for 10. It has just surfaced that she is questioning whether or not I am her 'soulmate'. It is really comical, if not pathetic, that a 'soulmate' trumps a loving partnership though marriage and the needs your childre have in keeping the family together, this is where we are. The funny thing is, whenever I tell people about her questioning whether or not I am her soulmate, they usually laugh and thing it is pathetic and self-absorbed.

[Katherine Derbyshire]

Originally Posted by Dan Schaal

We have been married for seven years and together for 10. It has just surfaced that she is questioning whether or not I am her 'soulmate'. It is really comical, if not pathetic, that a 'soulmate' trumps a loving partnership though marriage and the needs your childre have in keeping the family together, this is where we are. The funny thing is, whenever I tell people about her questioning whether or not I am her soulmate, they usually laugh and thing it is pathetic and self-absorbed.

I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life with someone who thought I was pathetic and self-absorbed. Even if it were true.

Athletic trainers often need to be reminded that the client's goals are their goals, however misguided they might seem to be. You can help the client meet them, you can gently educate them toward "better" goals, but you're not going to get anywhere by scoffing at them. This sounds like the same kind of situation. She may not be able to articulate it very well, but there's clearly a need that isn't being met. Telling her that it's silly won't make it go away.

Katherine

[Michael Dowling]

Originally Posted by Dan Schaal

We have been married for seven years and together for 10. It has just surfaced that she is questioning whether or not I am her 'soulmate'. It is really comical, if not pathetic, that a 'soulmate' trumps a loving partnership though marriage and the needs your childre have in keeping the family together, this is where we are. The funny thing is, whenever I tell people about her questioning whether or not I am her soulmate, they usually laugh and thing it is pathetic and self-absorbed.

marriage is only till death why does she need a soul-mate? seriously though, they say men cheat for physical needs and women cheat for emotional needs and by the time a woman cheats she has already left the relationship, where a man can be cheating and describe his marriage as a great one. this obviously isn't a hard and fast rule exceptions do apply some women i'm sure cheat just for physical reasons and some men do for emotional reasons, but largely it's true i think.

you probably missed some clear queues about her unhappiness early on, and typically once a woman steps out and has an affair she's already out of the relationship. she's now using the cheating as a means to end it permanently.

maybe try counseling or just let her go, you can't force someone to be with you if they don't want to, married or not. either way you have kids so that should be your focus and dating again i'm sure will be fun after 10 years with the same woman (lemons into lemonade man). free weekends, personal time, date new people, it isn't all bad man if it doesn't work out with the wife.

good luck, tough thing to go through especially with kids.

[Jamie Gowens]

I'm only saying "This..." because I'd rather see someone eating some eggs, bacon, and possibly some avocado or sweet potato...

[Michael Dowling]

hey dan, just to clarify this statement so it doesn't come off wrong, because i didn't like how it read:

"you probably missed some clear queues about her unhappiness early on, and typically once a woman steps out and has an affair she's already out of the relationship."

myself and probably 99.99% of men will miss the queues too, a lot of women can be cryptic and expect you to read thier minds instead of just telling us what's wrong and many of us men miss this since we're incapable of reading peoples minds. so that statement wasn't a knock on you at all, or to excuse your wife's behavior, the affair is immature and selfish and entirely on her.

good luck man...

my advice on the beer is cut it back but only drink very good beer, make it worth it basically. to me a bud light or coors light just isn't worth the drawbacks, but sam adams octoberfest, chimay ale, hoegarden, sierra nevada pale ale, or st. bernadus definitely are.

[Dan Schaal]

Originally Posted by Michael Dowling

hey dan, just to clarify this statement so it doesn't come off wrong, because i didn't like how it read:

"you probably missed some clear queues about her unhappiness early on, and typically once a woman steps out and has an affair she's already out of the relationship."

myself and probably 99.99% of men will miss the queues too, a lot of women can be cryptic and expect you to read thier minds instead of just telling us what's wrong and many of us men miss this since we're incapable of reading peoples minds. so that statement wasn't a knock on you at all, or to excuse your wife's behavior, the affair is immature and selfish and entirely on her.

good luck man...

my advice on the beer is cut it back but only drink very good beer, make it worth it basically. to me a bud light or coors light just isn't worth the drawbacks, but sam adams octoberfest, chimay ale, hoegarden, sierra nevada pale ale, or st. bernadus definitely are.

Thank you very much Michael. Your words are spot on.

I am going to enjoy of couple of Sam Adams this evening while watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.