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Old 09-10-2009, 07:38 AM   #1
Sean Dunston
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Bread

I was going to post this in Nutrition, but thought that some people might take it seriously...

Did you know:

Quote:
1) More than 98 percent of convicted criminals are bread eaters!

2) Exactly half of all children who grow up in bread - eating households score in the bottom 50% on standardized IQ tests !

3) In the 19th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 55 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, scarlet fever, smallpox and influenza ravaged entire nations !

4) Statistics show that more than 75% of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread!

5) Bread is made from a substance called "dough." Researchers have proven that as little as one pound of dough can choke a large animal like a horse. The average person eats more bread than that in one month!

6) Bread is known to be extremely addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water, actually begged for bread after just two days!

7) Bread is a "gateway" food item, which usually leads to such items as butter, jam, peanut butter and even ... bacon!

8) Bread has been proven to kill. Scientists have now uncovered alarming evidence that 100% of the people who eat bread will eventually die!

9) Unattended newborn babies can choke on bread!

10) Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 425 degrees Fahrenheit! Don't laugh...that kind of heat can kill a full grown adult in less than five minutes.

11) 96% of cancer victims eventually admit that they've eaten bread!

12) Sadly, 9 out of 10 bread eaters are unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.
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Old 09-10-2009, 07:56 AM   #2
Owen Bird
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Re: Bread

Reads like a list of the threats of Dihydrogen Monoxide.
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Old 09-10-2009, 08:02 AM   #3
Jamie J. Skibicki
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Re: Bread

"Reads like a list of the threats of Dihydrogen Monoxide. "

# is also known as hydric acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
# is a potent solvent that can, over time, dissolve virtually anything.
# has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.
# can cause severe burns.
# contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
# accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
# may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
# is known to be an appetite and libido suppressant.

Regardless of the danger, it is still used
# as an industrial solvent and coolant.
# in nuclear power plants.
# in the production of harmful chemicals.
# as a fire retardant.
# in many forms of animal research.
# in the distribution of pesticides.
# as a potent preservative to keep grocery store produce
looking fresh and appetizing.
# as an ingredient in baby and infant products, especially formulas.
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Old 09-10-2009, 09:38 AM   #4
Eric Doolittle
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Re: Bread

Quote:
10) Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 425 degrees Fahrenheit! Don't laugh...that kind of heat can kill a full grown adult in less than five minutes.
I dunno, I swear I survived that kind of heat for six months
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Old 09-10-2009, 10:51 AM   #5
Scott Moore.
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Re: Bread

100% of people eat bread DIE
100% of people who don't eat bread....STILL DIE
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Old 09-10-2009, 11:47 PM   #6
Luke Hale
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Re: Bread

87.2% of all statistics are completely made up
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Old 09-11-2009, 06:00 AM   #7
Jamie J. Skibicki
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Re: Bread

5 out of 4 people are bad at fractions
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Old 09-11-2009, 06:11 AM   #8
Paul Sousa
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Re: Bread

120% of people that read this read will have read this thread.
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